It was the best of times - it was the worst of times.

Friday, March 20, 2009

Can I just say how much fun I’m having with this blog? And the titles? LOL OK, on with the show…

The morning starts out the same…Adiva and I have our ‘stall dance’ and amazingly she agrees to my terms so she jumps into her stall. Did I just win the war? Anywho, after work, I head back to play with my girls. Adiva proves she’s learnt her lesson - she goes into her stall, hangs out, comes out, goes back in, looks at me like ‘see what I’m doing?’ and she’s so proud of herself. I’m proud of her too, actually. After I feed, Adiva wants to spend time with me, so I grab her out and go exploring. She takes me all over the property, and is having a blast. She’s grazing here, walking there - I love her so much. She’s really relying on me to not put her in a bad situation. She’s actually starting to really trust me as mom.

When I turn her out, Anni comes over for her attention. So I get her, groom her, and away we go. I’m still on cloud nine from how well Adiva worked, but I’m on edge as I still don’t know Anni’s buttons. She has yet to really spook, so I just don’t know what to expect. Well, I’m about to find out, in a big way, in a hurry. All around the house is all this plastic. It’s like what you’d use to line a garden for weed control. B used it to ‘tarp’ the roof, and it’s fallen off as the wind grabbed it. Now it’s all over, and while Adiva learned it’s not a big deal, Anni isn’t buying it. The plastic is going to eat her. She balks, pulls, threatens to pull me off my feet. Ok…let’s not do that. I slowly ask her to step up, and she does, one hoof at a time. That’s fine, it’s better than fighting me. I grab the plastic - she doesn’t care too much about that, but she’s not getting any closer. I can live with that and take her away so she can graze a bit.

After a few minutes of grazing, I decide to walk her a bit more, so I ask her to step up (it’s my code word for them) and we move forward. All of a sudden, we’re not walking. My right hand is moving up and behind me, and as I turn to see what’s going on, something knocks into my right wrist just as I glimpse a hoof. Shithellfuckdamn. I crouch and turn to the left, hoping I don’t get a hoof to my head. And that she doesn’t pull me off my feet. She lands, and I turn to her and start backing her. I’m not angry (tho I should be) and I’m just trying to comprehend what happened. She’s not spooked, we weren’t doing anything new or different, and there was no warning. We walk a bit more, then I turn her out. I’m so confused - what the hell caused that? She didn’t even seem to feel bad, or recognize that she had done anything wrong. My gut is telling me that I need to slow things down, that she got pushed too far, that she doesn’t trust me. No, not trust…she doesn’t understand that I love her and won’t hurt her. That it’s safe here. I know she is happy. I know she’s relaxed. I know she has fun and is really blooming. But maybe, just maybe, if she’s never been loved before, there isn’t that desire to please. That urge to be good. If her human interaction has been lacking up until now, she wouldn’t get how it all works. So, for now, we’re gonna just hang out. Graze, get groomed, get lots of love and attention. I’ll slow her “training” down for a while, and hope it’s a fluke. It has to be a fluke, right? I mean, the alternative is unthinkable. And don’t worry - my wrist is fine. ;)